Thursday, November 17, 2011

Wish I had lived those two hours differently..

I was travelling in a crowded bus with a group of my college friends talking about the day, pending submissions, our exams and as always, our crushes. We enjoyed each other's company. I loved to be with them and my family all the time. They made me feel secure. Those were the days when Orkut was popular and some guy named Mark Zuckerberg was busy comparing pics of different people not knowing what it would eventually turn out to be!! We had mp3 players back then, but it was for the "upper" class. We believed in networking with friends - in person.

But that day was different..

Our bus was stuck in a traffic jam. Amidst all the tiring and sweating bodies standing around, I peeked outside. I saw a shiny silver car. It was very beautiful, one that you will admire just by what you see!! The car was Mercedes Benz!! My dream car since I was a little one who couldn't even spell M-e-r-c-e-d-e-s. I tried looking inside the car. I couldn't see the person who was driving it. But thanks to the reflective glass, I saw myself. I wondered how difficult it would be for me to own it. That's what dreams are made of, isn't it? My dream of having a Mercedes grew stronger. And I was determined again!! But how? With my busy college schedule and socializing with friends, I will never find time to develop my skill-sets and become rich and buy a Mercedes. Wish I had two extra hours every day!!



Twenty years later..

I hate this traffic jam!! It's been there since the time I can remember. Indian economy is growing, and we are producing more cars at a rate which is second only to India's birth rate!! Wish there was a fly-over above the fly-over I am driving on. And its bad for my car too!! How on Earth can a Mercedes wait in a queue with Nano's and other equivalents!! Ohh yes, you guessed it right. I am driving my own Mercedes - and that too an imported one. But how, you might ask. I made my two extra hours a day count!! I worked hard for my graduation, did post-graduation, sacrificed my family time, sacrificed socializing with my friends - my own people who made me - ME!! I had a one point agenda to become rich and drive my Mercedes - which I did. Boy, am I successful now?

But that day was different..

Enjoying my music and breathing out of a cool, temperature showing, costly air-conditioner - I peeked outside. I can see everything that's happening outside - the same cannot be said for people outside though!! I saw a crowded bus. People struggling for space, and quite literally pushing each other to even breathe. I sympathized with their situation and those of my struggling days. This made me feel even more successful!! That's when I saw a group of office going guys talking to each other in the bus. Even they were struggling to find that key element in a crowded bus - breathing space. They appeared to be close friends. They were showing their mobile phones, were sharing something to each other and laughing!! Laughing even in adversity, I thought. I saw one guy closely. He was looking just like me, but behaving much differently than what I would normally behave with people. You see, I am more decent and dignified now while interacting with people. That guy was more outspoken and not concerned what others would think of him. I was like that, you know. He reminded me of someone - ME, back in those days!!

That's when reality slapped me like a girl would do when she's betrayed by her prince. The guy I am observing was actually me - with an alternate timeline. He is exactly what I would have been if I hadn't made my materialistic dream a reality. Had I shared those extra two hours with my family / friends, I would still have them around. I would still be all that guy in the bus was. I kept staring at him, with deep regret and a sudden loss of interest in life. In between his talks, he looked outside the bus. I lowered the window pane and looked at him. Our eyes met. I saw that same passion in his eyes to own a Mercedes. He looked at me and winked. I smiled. And then strangely, he started talking to his friends again and completely ignored me. I pitied myself. That guy, my alternate self, made a decision looking at me that he will never become what I am. I, who was the king of my life, became a peasant again!! Twenty years of hardship suddenly meant nothing to me. My dreams shattered me!! Wish I could get back those two extra hours every day that I spent on climbing the ladder of success!!

I would have been the same person had I utilized my two hours differently back then. I concentrated on career and only career and here I am - with everything I ever needed, but no one to share it with. There, that guy, probably doesn't even have a car, but has friends / close ones who will be with his through the adversity!!

I won the battle of career but lost the war of life!!

Just two hours!! That's all it takes. And the best part is - you already have those two hours with you!! Now It's upto you how / where to find it and, more importantly, to make it count!!

32 comments:

  1. Life can't be the same always. If you had been climbing trees all the life, you would have wanted to do something else .. that is the way mind works. So, don't think you have lost the war of life .. you still can carve out two hours to fulfill your dreams!

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  2. Very thought-provoking post... I wish all of us could realize the importance of time... Two hours would really have changed our lives then... Thank you for this well-composed write-up. I like the way you have beautifully explained each aspect. Keep writing.. You have that flair :)
    Anukriti

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  3. @Aativas: I am glad you commented this way. That's exactly how I wanted the reader to feel. I wanted this post to be an open ended post. Reader should interpret it their own way. And about me again carving out two hours to fulfill my dreams, you are actually mentioning what should ideally happen in the next step :)

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  4. @Swati: Thank you for the appreciation.

    @Anukriti: Time is the most important and the most scarce resource we have. Unfortunately, most of us aren't even aware of it. Money will come again, but lost time won't. That's why they say "Time and Tide waits for no one". And thanks for appreciating my writing. It's an honor.

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  5. I so loved the first paragraph. This is the first post I am reading on this topic. And believe me I am so impressed. Kudos to you for coming up with such an intellectual piece.

    You wrote I am looking at myself, the alternate me with different timeline. It was such a thoughtful line. I pray you win as you truly deserve. Imagine I am saying so much. Sorry for speaking much, I so loved your take on this topic:)

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  6. Thanks Saru :) The best comparison we can ever make is with ourself. And that's why I thought of including the timeline concept.

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  7. Firstly, the logo, where wish is crossed, is one of a kind.
    Very well stressed the miss people are doing, in achieving their goals.
    very well penned.

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  8. TIme s what we make of it..nice post.here s my take - http://zradar.wordpress.com/2011/11/17/we-learn-with-time-and-burn-the-same/
    do have a look

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  9. A thought provoking post.
    Thanks for sharing.

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  10. I feel, after reading your blog, you can do a lot for people who are struggling to save those two hours......

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  11. @Pramodji - Am happy you noticed the image. Wish was cancelled for a reason, because we all have time, we just cannot utilize it with the right people :)

    @zradar, Maitreyee, Bindu - Am glad you liked the post :)

    @Matheikal - Truly honored reading your comment :)

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  12. :) Way to go Binu, I am sort of curious to know what made you think so deep and blog....

    I wondered if it is your entry for Surf Excel competition or just a thought....

    I want an Audi with a 24x7 chauffeur :) Lottery lagani hai mujhe :D

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  13. @Chintan: Yes, this is for the Surf Excel Matic contest on Indiblogger. Through this post, I wanted to convey 2 messages:
    1. We have those 2 hours with us. Its right in front of us.
    2. Decisions we make by sacrificing our dear ones.

    As far as Audi is concerned, you see Chintan, you also have those 2 hours!! :)

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  14. Wow. Such an amazing read. I'm sure everyone of us would be able to relate to it. It is difficult to keep rising in career, when our focus is diverted (on friends, family), and at the same time, it is difficult to maintain good relationship when we start focusing on our career. In the end, what matters is not which battle we've won, but when we realize what we've lost. Wonderfully written. Good luck :-)

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  15. @Ashwini: It's a catch-22 situation between family / friends and career!! And you've hit the nail on the head with your statement - "In the end, what matters is not which battle we've won, but when we realize what we've lost." True!! :)

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  16. thanks for dropping by....
    Your blog post was indeed thought provoking..
    yup...we do need to spend time wid our dear ones...after all..material happiness is so less compared to heir love and care...all the best to you tooo

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  17. @The Madrasi: Am glad you agree with my viewpoint.. :)

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  18. Wow..what a touching post..Why don't we get perfect world? Wow you drive a Merc. People will be ready to exchange their place with you !. There are always some regrets in life..one needs to choose the lesser one..BTW it's not still late to do what you want...

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  19. Thanks buddy!! And no, I don't have a Mercedes (yet) but I take your comment as a compliment as a measure of my writing :)

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  20. Boy you can write.
    How come your Blog was hidden from me.
    Bookmarked : )

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  21. Hi Binu, very interesting. Very imaginative. enjoyed it from start to finish. Wish you the best!

    Seena

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  22. Hi Binu, what an interesting perspective. Enjoyed every bit from start to finish. Wish you all the very best.

    Sometimes it need not be one's career. Anything that consumes us to the point where we take our loved ones for granted.

    Love the name of your Blog. Blogger's park. :) Sure seems like an interesting hangout place!

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  23. Thanks Abhishek.

    @Cna: It's always a decision between family / career for us. We have options at every stage - one for welfare of family / friends and the other, for our own welfare. Unfortunately, we prefer the 2nd option.

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  24. Wow Binu, adipoli post.. loved the moment whr the old u sees the new u n the realization comes across.. n yes, a very brilliant point brought out in a brilliant way... we all hv our two hours; we just need to make the most of them nw...

    Brilliant one, Binu.. one of the best I've read :)

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  25. Thanks you Raj for the lovely comments!! I just thought to emphasize the 2 hours we have in a different way :) Glad you liked it..

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  26. The post has an introspecting angle and treatment to this angle is unique.

    It is different!

    Best of Luck for the contest!

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  27. Thanks Neeraj. Wish you the same too buddy!!

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  28. Impressive write-up.All the Best Binu!.God Bless!!.

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All yours..

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