Sunday, June 09, 2013

We Came, WeChat, we Conquered!

One Saturday evening. One lazy Saturday evening. I lay there, resting on my couch with nothing much to do. Feels like conquering the world, but that's not the case here. Facebook seems to be dead since no one is online. Twitter users are busy promoting a hashtag without knowing what it means. A popular chat app has become a paid app in android after one year and hence most of my chat friends have deactivated it. Television is busy showing a dubbed South Indian movie for like the (n+1)th time. No Soccer too. There's some breaking news going on and the news anchor is screaming at the top of his voice, "The nation wants to know.." I wonder which part of the nation he is referring to! I cannot even sleep as the government / municipalities are busy digging the road with their long cranes just before the rains (nothing new here too).

Unable to bear the boredom, I opened the "Play Store" in my Android smartphone to see if there's anything new and exciting and bingo - I found a new app that's trending. It's called - WeChat.

It seemed fascinating. I installed the app. The moment installation and the basic registration process was done, guess what happened. I got an immediate "Hi" from one of my contacts. The world know him as - "Joker". Knowing how crazy the guy is, he immediately added few members and before I know what's happening there were 6 members and we were in a group chat!

The participants were -

  • The Joker, of course 
  • "Captain" Jack Sparrow
  • News Presenter "AG"
  • A 'not-so-santh' Cricketer
  • Anonymous Indian Politician
  • Yours truly

And this is how the group chat went - 
News Presenter "AG": Ladies and gentlemen, we have with us some of the well known personalities from this world and also out of this world. Let me introduce them to you..
JokerGood evening, ladies and gentlemen. We are tonight’s entertainment! Well, you look nervous. Is it the scars? You want to know how I got ‘em? By the way, where's the lady we are talking about?
AGLet's not deviate from the topic here, Joker. I assure you, you will get your chance to write. Today, the nation wants to know the inside story of spot fixing in the popular cricket league! We have with us one of the prominent personalities from the world of spot fixing - Mr. Cricketer! So, let me start with you, the nation wants to know how did you do it? 
Cricketer: Well, you know I am a technology freak. For communication with the bookies, I used different chatting apps. The police tracked them down and now I have changed the app!
AG: My only question to you tonight is WHY? WHY did you do it?
JokerIf you’re good at something, never do it for free.
Cricketer: Right. I agree with Joker here. 
AG: Yes, thanks Joker. That's what I was getting at. Let me bring in another participant here - anonymous politician, who doesn't want to be named. Sir, what's your take on this? 
Politician: The matter is sub-judice. I would not be able to comment on this. But I will say the opposition is involved here. There's no doubt about that. 
AG: But that's not the topic we want to discuss here sir. That's the next topic. This is about spot fixing.  
Me (finally): Is this really "The Joker". Huge fan of yours sir! I must tell you I have seen your movie a zillion times and felt sad when you apparently died.
AG: Once again we are deviating from the topic gentlemen. Let me bring me Mr. Jack Sparrow into this discussion..
Captain Jack Sparrow (using the voice chat option in WeChat): "Captain" Jack Sparrow. Why do people always forget to include "Captain"? 
AG: Of course, Captain.  
Me: Am I dreaming? 
AG: One participant at a time, please. So Captain, are you there on the group chat? 
Captain (voice message): Aye.. 
AG: Ok. Captain, why do you think the authorities took so long to catch the culprits? 
Captain (voice message): If they were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.. 
AG: Do you think there are others involved in the conspiracy too? Any women you think? Where are they? 
Captain (voice message)She’s safe, just like I promised. She’s all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we’re all men of our word really… except for, of course, Elizabeth, who is in fact, a woman. 
AG: No. I didn't make any promises Captain. I am not sure what you are discussing.. Moving on.. Coming back to Joker.. 
JokerOh, you. You just couldn’t let me go, could you? This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren’t you? Huh? You won’t kill me out of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. And I won’t kill you because you’re just too much fun. I think you and I are destined to do this forever. 
AG: So what's your plan Joker to catch all the culprits involved? For once, be honest and reveal your plans in front of the nation.. 
Joker: Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I’m a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it. You know, I just… do things. 
AG: I have no idea what you are trying to imply here. Let me bring in ME who's just raised his hand to speak. ME, go on.. 
ME: Joker and Captain Jack Sparrow together. This seems like a dream in a dream. Is this Inception all over again? 
AG: This is reality, my friend! Reality. Gentlemen, we are running out of time. Final comments. Captain, you go first..
Captain (voice message): This is the day you will always remember as the day you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow! 
Captain Jack Sparrow leaves the group chat. 
AG: I believe we have lost the link. Anyways, Cricketer. You are next..
Cricketer: I am being framed. I would like to reach out to millions, no sorry, 100's of my fans, actually 10's of my fans to support me through this. I will come out clean, I promise. 
Politician: The opposition is behind this. Opposition is playing dirty politics.
JokerHow about a magic trick? I’m gonna make this pencil my profile disappear. Ta-daaa! It’s.. it’s gone. 
Joker leaves the group chat.  
Me: Is this really a dream? 
AG: Thank you gentlemen for your participation. We will be tracking this event 24*7 live only on your news channel (thinking that this is actually his news channel). Coming up next are the advertisements that make us earn our millions. Stay tuned.
As we all know, nothing really comes out of such discussions. But my Saturday evening was well and truly worth it! What the participants said in this group chat on WeChat platform are their trademark statements and it's precisely this reason why I wanted them in this chat.

We came, WeChat and We Conquered!

PS: This post is part of a contest run by WeChat and IndiBlogger.

PS (again): This post was one of the Runner-ups in the contest. Thank you guys! God Bless!


  1. Awesomeeeeeeeeee :D Superb one BINU... you nailed it ! I couldnt get to think what to put it up for this contest so I backed out and u have done a superb job :D

    All the best :D

    1. Thanks Ramya. This contest allowed me to include two of the best movie characters - Jack Sparrow and The Joker - on the same page (in this case, same app).. :)

  2. I bet he has only 10s of fans. Good one Binu. All the very best :)

  3. Wow. What a way to include JackSparrow here. The best minds in one chat. Awesome :-) Good Luck :-)


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